The Meaning of Men

S4,Ep8: The Meaning of Men's Therapy | Building resilience, clarity & confidence

How can men start getting the most from therapy?
In this episode of The Meaning of Men I'm joined by Chris Hemmings. Chris is a former BBC journalist whose own struggles with grief, addiction and depression led him to retrain as a psychotherapist and build Men’s Therapy Hub — a platform connecting men with male therapists across the UK.
Chris explains that many men aren’t avoiding therapy because they don’t care — but because they fear judgment, being seem as weak, or being told they need to become someone they’re not. Together we start to explore some of these myths, what men really need from their therapists and how they can best show up to get the most from therapy. 
In this episode you will learn:
Why men often avoid therapy and how to overcome the stigma
The biggest misconceptions about counselling for men
How masculinity and emotional strength can work together
What to look for when choosing the right therapist
Why seeking help is an act of courage, not weakness
Hear more from Chris:
Men's Therapy Hub: www.menstherapyhub.co.uk
 
No Man's an Island podcast: Spotify:
https://open.spotify.com/show/5QgINHeUZKorBCE4LBoBXF
Apple:
https://podcasts.apple.com/dk/podcast/no-mans-an-island/id1849171262?i=1000745844084
 
My website: www.chrishemmings.co.uk
 
Timestamps:
09:27: Misconceptions About Therapy
18:36: Finding the Right Therapist
23:47: The Importance of Gut Feel in Therapy
24:40: Investment Mindset in Therapy
25:45: Shifting from 'Should' to 'Could' in Therapy
28:45: Normalizing Emotions and Removing Shame
31:37: The Role of Humor in Therapy
36:07: Understanding Worthiness in Therapy
40:49: Approaching Therapy with Courage
45:58: Demystifying Therapy for Men
 

S4, Ep7: The Meaning of Raising Boys | Helping sons thrive today

What do boys and young men actually need from us right now?
In this episode of The Meaning of Men, I sit down with Lorraine Candy — journalist, editor and bestselling author — to explore what boys really need in today’s digital, headline-driven culture.
From emotional regulation and developmental vulnerability to social media, gaming and the “toxic masculinity” narrative, this conversation cuts through the panic and brings clarity to modern parenting. Lorraine explains why boys often lag behind girls emotionally, how media messaging distorts expectations, and why blanket bans on technology rarely solve the real problem.
We explore practical tools for raising emotionally healthy boys: setting boundaries with clear consequences, building connection through rituals, repairing ruptures after conflict, and meeting boys where they are — not where we think they should be.
If you’re parenting a son — whether he’s five or fifteen — and wondering if you’re getting it right, this episode offers grounded insight, reassurance and practical strategies to help boys grow into confident, compassionate and resilient men.
In this episode you will learn:
Why boys develop differently — and what that means for parenting
How media narratives shape fear around masculinity
Why connection beats control when setting boundaries
How to talk to boys about technology and influencers
The power of repair in strengthening your relationship
Disclaimer: Lorraine's advice is not specifically for anyone parenting neurodivergent teens or children with SEN. 
Hear more from Lorraine: 
Substack parenting newsletter: https://open.substack.com/pub/lorrainecandy
Lorraine's book: https://harpercollins.co.uk/products/mum-whats-wrong-with-you-101-things-only-mothers-of-teenage-girls-know-lorraine-candy
 
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/p/CqkuOJeI01m/?igsh=MXB5N3d1ZzV5ZnFieg==
 
Timestamps:
04:05: Understanding Boys: Vulnerability and Development
06:42: The Impact of Media on Parenting Expectations
09:54: Emotional Development and Communication with Boys
12:46: The Role of Technology in Boys' Lives
15:54: Recognizing Behavioral Changes in Adolescents
18:36: Building Connections Through Rituals
21:45: Critical Thinking in Parenting: Media Influence
24:35: The Importance of Open Conversations About Emotions
33:06: Navigating the Impact of Social Media on Boys
34:45: Setting Healthy Boundaries for Teenage Boys
39:02: The Importance of Communication and Connection
41:58: Understanding Emotional Regulation in Boys
45:35: Maintaining Connections During Adolescence
50:04: Redefining Masculinity and Role Models
53:49: Reassurance for Parents Raising Boy

S4, Ep6: The Meaning of Black Men’s Health | Race, identity and early mortality

Why are Black men in America living 13 years less than their healthiest counterparts?
In this episode of The Meaning of Men, I sit down with Professor Derek M. Griffith, leading public health researcher and global expert on Black men’s health, to unpack the crisis hiding in plain sight.
From life expectancy gaps and suicide rates to structural racism, economic inequality and the commercial determinants of health, this conversation explores why Black men’s health outcomes remain among the worst in the United States — and what can be done about it.
Professor Griffith explains why he prefers the term manhood over masculinity, how identity and societal expectations shape behaviour, and why men’s health is too often framed as an individual failure rather than a policy priority.
If you care about men’s mental health, health equity, masculinity, fatherhood, purpose, resilience, and social justice — this episode is essential listening.
In this episode you will learn:
Why the 13-year life expectancy gap for Black men exists
How structural racism impacts physical and mental health
The difference between masculinity and manhood — and why it matters
Why men’s health is overlooked in public policy
Practical policy shifts that could transform outcomes for Black men
Hear more from Derek:
https://prmh.nursing.upenn.edu/
Timestamps:
03:11: The Journey to Addressing Men's Health
05:45: The State of Black Men's Health
10:49: Historical Context of Manhood and Masculinity
16:01: The Role of Provider in Black Communities
20:59: Defining Manhood vs. Masculinity
25:56: The Visibility of Men's Health Issues
30:58: Policy Changes for Men's Health
36:04: Hope for the Future of Men's Health
 
 
 
 

S4, Ep5: The Meaning of March or Die | Why men get stuck—and how to move forward

What do you do when staying where you are feels safer—but moving forward is the only way to survive?
In this episode of The Meaning of Men, I'm joined by Marine Corps veteran Jeremy Stalnecker to explore the life-defining philosophy of March or Die. Drawing from Jeremy’s combat experience in Iraq and his work supporting veterans, first responders, and men in crisis, this conversation goes deep into identity, trauma, resilience, and responsibility.
We unpack what happens when men tie their sense of self to a role, a past version of themselves, or a traumatic experience—and how that can quietly destroy relationships, purpose, and hope. Jeremy shares why victimhood can feel comforting, why doing nothing is often the most dangerous choice, and how true resilience is built before crisis hits. This episode is essential listening for men navigating transition, burnout, loss, or the quiet feeling of just existing rather than truly living.
In this episode you will learn:
Why “marching” is a daily decision, not a one-time breakthrough
How identity loss fuels anger, isolation, and hopelessness
The hidden comfort of staying stuck—and how to break free
Why responsibility is the gateway to freedom
How men can move forward even when the future feels unclear
Hear more from Jeremy:
Jeremy’s social media:
https://www.facebook.com/jeremystalneckerofficial
https://www.instagram.com/jeremystalnecker/
https://x.com/jstalnecker
https://www.youtube.com/@MightyOaksFoundation
https://www.linkedin.com/in/jeremy-stalnecker-63a2a17/
 
Jeremy’s website:
https://www.jeremystalnecker.com/
 
Timestamps:
03:47: The Journey from Military to Ministry
06:35: Reconnecting with Identity and Purpose
09:43: The Work of Mighty Oaks Foundation
12:46: March or Die: A Military Philosophy
15:35: Choosing to Move Forward
18:34: The Power of Decision-Making
21:32: Victim Mentality vs. Survivor Mindset
24:22: Identity and Trauma
27:28: The Challenge of Defining Masculinity
30:19: Understanding Trauma and Identity
36:17: The Importance of Preparation for Adversity
42:08: Navigating Change and Decision-Making
45:35: Finding Hope and Purpose in Life

S4, Ep4: The Meaning of Misogyny | How it fuels extremism and harms men and women

What is misogyny really all about, and why do rigid ideas of masculinity harm boys and make them vulnerable to radical narratives?
In this episode of The Meaning of Men, I'm joined by Cynthia Miller-Idriss, one of the world’s leading experts on extremism, gender, and online radicalisation, to explore the deeper meaning of misogyny and why it matters for men’s mental health, belonging, and purpose.
Together, we unpack how misogyny often lays the cultural groundwork for extremist beliefs, hate-fuelled violence, and rigid models of masculinity that leave boys and men isolated, angry, and vulnerable. This conversation goes beyond blame, asking harder questions about loneliness, grievance-based online content, the influence of algorithms, and why so many men are searching for meaning in unhealthy places.
In this episode you will learn:
How misogyny becomes a gateway to extremism and mass violence
The hidden damage rigid masculinity does to boys — and why it fuels radicalisation
How influencers, algorithms, and grievance culture pull men down dark paths
Why loneliness and lost purpose leave men vulnerable — and what actually protects them
What “calling men in” really looks like, and how to build healthier paths to meaning
Hear more from Cynthia:
Book: Man Up - The New Misogyny and the Rise of Violent Extremism: https://press.princeton.edu/books/hardcover/9780691257549/man-up
 
Timestamps:
00:59: Cynthia's Journey and Academic Background
04:31: Understanding Misogyny and Its Broader Implications
08:46: The Link Between Misogyny and Extremism
12:04: Exploring Influencers and Their Impact on Men
16:39: The Man Box: Conditioning and Its Consequences
23:07: Finding Healthier Forms of Belonging
28:28: The Importance of Meaning and Purpose for Men
33:56: Hope for the Future: Engaging Conversations and Solutions

S4, Ep3: The Meaning of Male Nannies | Breaking gender norms in childcare

Why are men so often discouraged from caregiving roles?
In this episode of The Meaning of Men, I sit down with Joss Cambridge Simmons (aka Jossy Care), a male nanny and caregiver who is redefining what it means to be a man in today’s world. Together, we explore the rarely discussed role of male nannies, the stigma men face in caregiving roles, and why love, presence, and emotional safety are not weaknesses, but essential human strengths.
Joss shares his personal journey into childcare, how caregiving shaped his understanding of masculinity, and what children, families, and society gain when men show up with softness and intention. This conversation goes far beyond childcare — touching on fatherhood beyond biology, purpose-driven work, resilience in the face of judgement, and the importance of positive male role models in children’s lives.
Whether you’re a father, a caregiver, or a man questioning traditional expectations and masculinity, this episode offers insight, challenge, and inspiration for living with deeper meaning.
In this episode you will learn:
Why caregiving is a powerful expression of masculinity
How male nannies challenge outdated gender norms
The impact emotionally present men have on children
How love and softness build resilience in men
Why purpose often lies beyond society’s expectations
Hear more from Joss:
www.instagram.com/jossycare
 
Here Is An App That Can Support Families' Busy Schedules: "TRYBE"  Subscribe Monthly Or Yearly
 
Watch  Me On CBBCS "Our School" Our School
 
Watch the Nanny Man Documentary  Nanny Man
 
Watch My Recent Interview Here, Manny Life
 
Watch Me At the National Diversity Awards 2019
 
Become An Inclusive Anti-Racist Educator / Parent & Adult Anti Racist Guide
 
Timestamps:
 
01:50: Becoming a Male Nanny: A Unique Path
05:09: Challenging Misconceptions of Men in Caregiving
10:07: Demand for Male Nannies and Societal Shifts
18:20: Redefining Masculinity
23:13: The Role of Love in Personal Growth
29:47: Navigating Parenting Challenges
35:22: Creating Safety Over Discipline
40:14: Encouraging Male Involvement in Childcare
 

S4, Ep2: The Meaning of Male Survivors | Understanding sexual abuse against men

Why is it still so hard to believe that men can be victims of sexual abuse?
In this episode of The Meaning of Men, I sit down with Duncan Craig OBE, founder of We Are Survivors, the leading UK charity supporting male survivors of sexual violence. Together, we explore the hidden reality of sexual abuse, exploitation, and violence experienced by boys and men—and why silence, stigma, and outdated assumptions keep so many suffering alone.
Duncan shares his personal journey as a survivor, the work he’s done supporting thousands of men each year, and the cultural myths that frame men solely as perpetrators rather than victims. This conversation challenges ideas around masculinity, shame, power, and vulnerability, while examining how systems, language, and policy continue to fail male survivors.
In this episode you will learn:
Why men often take over 20 years to disclose sexual abuse
How stigma and masculinity silence male survivors
What sexual exploitation of men actually looks like today
Why current laws and policies fail boys and men
How permission and safe spaces can save lives
Hear more from Duncan
www.wearesurvivors.org.uk
Timestamps
00:00: Understanding Male Survivorship
03:31: Duncan's Journey: From Survivor to Advocate
06:26: The National Landscape of Male Sexual Abuse
09:09: Breaking the Stigma: Male Victims Speak Out
12:12: The Complexity of Male Sexual Exploitation
14:57: Permission to Speak: The Emotional Landscape
17:44: Patterns of Disclosure: How Men Share Their Stories
20:28: The Role of Policy in Supporting Male Survivors
23:45: Creating Safe Spaces for Men
26:25: The Importance of Value and Self-Worth
29:23: Hope and Healing: Encouraging Men to Seek Help

S4, Ep1: The Meaning of Men's Advocacy (ft George TheTinMen)

What if the data shaping our understanding of gender equality is telling only half the story?
In this episode of The Meaning of Men, we’re exploring some of the most uncomfortable—and most necessary—questions in the conversation about men and boys. I’m joined by George TheTinMen whose work in this space has become a lightning rod for honest, data-led conversations about men, boys and gender equality. 
Together, we take a 30,000-foot view of the state of men’s health and wellbeing today, looking at everything from mortality and mental health to the scale of domestic violence against men and common media narratives that often distort gender data and reinforce myths over truth.
In this episode you'll learn:
Why men experience worse outcomes across health, mortality and wellbeing
How the Global Gender Gap Report heavily skews the public debate around gender equality
The overlooked reality of domestic violence against men
What’s really driving young men toward figures like Andrew Tate
Why listening to boys may be the key to long-term cultural change
Hear more from George TheTinMen:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thetinmen/
Timestamps:
07:50: The State of Men's Health and Wellbeing
10:31: Understanding Domestic Violence Against Men
22:34: The Manosphere and Its Impact
24:43: Understanding the Void for Boys and Men
28:06: Listening to Boys: A New Approach
30:33: The Misconceptions of Andrew Tate and Misogyny
37:04: Critique of the Global Gender Gap Report
48:39: Positive Changes for Boys and Men
53:46: Closing Thoughts and Call to Action

The Meaning of Men Annual Wrap 2025!

What an incredible year it has been!
In this special year-end wrap-up episode of The Meaning of Men, I reflect back on the first amazing 12 months of the podcast, revisiting the conversations that shaped a deeper, more honest exploration of modern masculinity.
Sixty episodes in, the defining question at the heart of the show feels more relevant than ever: what does it truly mean to be a man today?
Featuring highlights from some of the worlds leading thinkers, researchers, authors and clinicians, this episode explores the shifting role of men in a world of changing gender dynamics, the complexities of men’s mental health, and why simply “telling men to talk” isn’t enough. From the science of dopamine and rejection, to fatherhood, male friendships, anger, fun, sleep, and purpose, each segment reveals practical insights into how men can live with greater resilience, connection, and meaning.
Whether you’re new to The Meaning of Men or have listened since episode one, this episode is both a celebration and a call to keep asking better questions.
I'll see you again in the first week of January 2026 for Season 4!
Timestamps:
01:10: The Impact of Gender Roles on Men
04:32: The Challenge of Men's Mental Health Conversations
05:06: Creating Safe Spaces for Vulnerability
07:17: The Importance of Fathers in Child Development
07:31: Father Figures and Mental Health Outcomes
09:28: Understanding Dopamine: The Drive for More
11:54: The Cycle of Dissatisfaction and Happiness
13:57: Understanding Rejection: An Evolutionary Perspective
13:58: The Psychological Impact of Rejection
16:15: Reclaiming Fun in Our Lives
16:35: The Impact of a Fun-Starved Life
21:23: Understanding Anger: A Misunderstood Emotion
21:45: Harnessing Anger for Personal Growth
24:05: The Impact of Social Media on Masculinity
24:34: Mainstream Masculinity Influencers and Their Effects
29:23: Practical Strategies for Better Sleep
32:10: Navigating Stress and Presence
32:39: The Concept of the Third Space
35:38: The Search for Meaning in Men's Lives
35:56: Understanding Meaning Beyond Feelings
39:54: Celebrating a Year of Insights
40:24: Looking Ahead to Season Four

S3, Ep19: The Meaning of The Manosphere | What's really drawing boys in

What if masculinity influencers aren’t the real problem, but a symptom of something much deeper?
Across the world, boys and young men are being pulled into the Manosphere in huge numbers. But behind the clickbait headlines and media panic lies a more important question: why are so many boys going there in the first place?
In the Season 3 finale The Meaning of Men I speak with psychotherapist Will Adolphy, who brings a rare, first-hand perspective on the Manosphere having been drawn into these spaces himself as a young man. Will unpacks the emotional, cultural and psychological forces that make boys vulnerable to online influencers, and why simply blaming the internet misses the real issue.
 
In this episode you will learn:
What draws boys to the Manosphere, and why it’s often more about belonging, structure and identity than misogyny
Will’s own personal journey through the Manosphere and what helped him break free from it
Why banning influencers doesn’t work, and the deeper cultural issues that must be addressed
Practical tools for having healthier conversations with boys without shaming, silencing or creating resistance
This episode is essential listening for anyone interested in boys’ development, men’s mental health, online influence and masculinity. It offers clarity, nuance and practical guidance for navigating one of the most misunderstood forces shaping young men today.
Hear more from Will:
Instagram - @psychwillWebsite - www.willadolphy.com
Documentary - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EmXsSNOpZ44&t=20s
Timestamps:
03:03: The Role of Masculinity in Modern Society
07:14: Defining the Manosphere: Communities and Influences
11:04: The Impact of Online Spaces on Young Men
12:54: Personal Journeys: From Vulnerability to Empowerment
22:18: The Need for Empathy and Guidance in Masculinity
24:11: The Internalisation of Masculine Ideals
30:55: Turning Points: The Shift Towards Healing and Self-Discovery
36:21: Ingredients for Recovery: Building a New Path
43:57: Exploring Self-Discovery and Balance
48:14: The Importance of Vulnerability and Non-Judgmental Spaces
55:09: Engaging Boys and Men in Meaningful Conversations
58:51: Shifting Perspectives on Masculinity and Empathy
01:05:56: Creating Safe Spaces for Open Dialogue
01:11:03: The Future of Boys and Men: Hope and Empowerment